Shut down, powerless, hiding form myself, hiding from everyone, there wasn't enough of me present to engage in life. I felt withdrawn, like looking out of a window watching everything going on around me but I felt stuck, disconnected.
Unable to express the agony and confusion of what it felt like to be me but couldn't understand why I felt so horrible and shut down.
Matthew Meinck, was the only person who could reach me, hiding inside too afraid to be seen or heard. Through our interactions, this terrified part began to feel safe to express like never before.
With his unique understanding, no textbook jargon, just gutsy real interaction with true sensitivity , I could feel the truth being uncovered from this hidden me.
Being sexually abused as a small child, the trauma is unbearable, no words, no concept of what it means, but the sense of it remains in the body, locked in. The pattern is set, the abuse continued throughout my life. This part of me was hidden, a secret life, born of this kind of pain.
Coming back to life has been painful, facing up to the trauma, the horrible feelings and disease in me.
Matthew goes so far beyond the limited concept we have been taught to believe is “healing” in the medical world. I avoided surgery having healed a condition called “endometriosis” which debilitated me for most of my adult life, by taking real care of myself, healing naturally!
If Matthew had not been so brutally cut down by the lies and media propaganda, a hell of a lot more people could have had the opportunity to truly heal, as I am.
post submitted by Debra
